Wow!! What a awesome couple of months:)
I’ve been a long journey throughout my adult life, searching for my purpose and destiny. I got married at 19, currently have 4 children and my husband is a God-fearing man of God. This can often be overwhelming for any person. I was raised to believe in “women’s rights”, “feminism”, you name it. I was taught to be a strong-willed women. Even though my family was “Christian” and went to church “religiously”, I was taught that submission to one’s husband was a requirement of scripture BUT relative to say the least.
After being married for 13 years, I’m finally seeing the truth. After coming to the realization that what I had been doing was not actually “submission”, I had to take a redirection in the course of my behavior and living. My husband had been trying to tell me for years that the behavior that I was portraying was not really submission. He had been complaining about my disrespect and showing me various ways I which I would disrespect him and his headship. Truthfully, at the time, I thought that HE was the one misunderstanding scripture and taking that verse out of context. God couldn’t really mean submit to a mere mortal man after he has said something to hurt MY feelings. After he had did things to sin against me. After he has clearly made visible mistakes, right?
I never cursed him out. I very seldom raised my voice to scream at him. I cooked. I cleaned. I took care of the kids. I stood by him. I, I, I. I never really considered him, my husband and how he was feeling. I discounted his feelings. I never really considered the truth in God’s word and how it stands all alone by itself. I took what the culture, my upbringing and my own opinions and mixed them with the word to form my own understanding. Wow! This is potentially dangerous.
It wasn’t until I saw my marriage at the pivotal of divorce for the….uummm 5TH TIME, did I actually try to seek out God’s divine truth. I sought help from the world wide web through use of bible scripture, godly blogs, videos, etc. It was until then did I find out that what I was doing was actually rebellion. It was not godly submission and godly femininity. What I was taught was as “witchcraft”. (1 Samuel 15:23).
I realized that what society and culture constitutes as “femininity” is actually witchcraft, hedonism and ultimately IDOLATRY! Thanks to The Peaceful Wife and other sites devoted to showing women how to live in godly femininity, I began to learn what God wants me to be and how He desires me to live. I am still on my journey of course but I am definitely on my way!!
I refuse to let my generational curse of un-submission rule my life. I refuse to let witchcraft through rebellion to God’s word rule my life. For God’s word says “The head of woman is man” (Ephesians 5 NKJ). God has an ordained order that He expects from His children or those professing to be His.
I began to learn about the idolatry within my heart. How I lived in idolatry by placing my feelings, emotions, opinions, thoughts, hurt, pain, you name it, over God’s word. Over being obedient to Him. I thank God for wisdom and insight. I praise God for His grace and mercy on me and this world. I thank Him for giving me a chance to see the truth and for empowering me to walk in it each day.
I must say that each day is a struggle right now just like a baby learning to walk. Each day, I MUST press in to God’s word and Holy Spirit. If not, lets just say that day won’t go to well. I encourage everyone to study the truth in God’s word on this subject for yourself. Research and find resources and study materials to help you. There is true liberty and freedom is letting go and LETTING GO! In releasing everything even your most sacred things, to Him.
I do not want my postings to portray ‘one-sided ness’. Every marriage is different. Some may deal with abusiveness at the hands of their husbands, be it physical, emotional or mental. Some may deal with drug abuse and other marital issues. If you deal with any of these issues or any other serious issue, please seek the Lord for guidance. Also, professional/spiritual counseling by a trained and certified professional may be a viable solution. This blog posting, as well as other’s I may post, is devoted to highlighting my personal journey, knowledge and wisdom that I’ve learned and am learning along my journey to becoming the wife that God delights in based on His word. It’s devoted to helping other women whose marriages may have or be suffering because of their sin of rebellion, lack of respect and submission to their husband and who desire to change from this into the gentle and peaceable spirited wife that God desires. It’s devoted to women whose marriage may not be suffering but who desire to become what Christ want’s them to be. 1 Peter chapter 3.